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Tuesday, January 12, 2010

Tuesday's Randoms

1999 ruined Lauryn Hill for me. I loved her album, but what I didn’t love was hearing it EVERYWHERE I went. Party? Let’s play Lauryn. Playing Cards? Let’s play Lauryn. Bat Mitzvah? Let’s play Lauryn. To this day, I still can’t bring myself to listen to that classic album.

I wish someone would please tell my co-worker to stop tooting that thang up. She sits in her chair on her knees and just her very, very large backside in the air all day. It can’t be comfortable for her, and it sure is not comfortable for me. She needs to cut that out. No if, and, or butts about it.

I really don’t like when people try to pat themselves on the back. The big boss interrupted our team meeting today so he could self congratulate himself on his decision to close the office Friday because of the snow. Really? It was your decision? No, it wasn’t. Sure you played a part in it, but don’t act like you are autonomous and that we should praise you for using common sense.

Just once, I want someone who was caught using steroids to tell the truth. I took steroids and it helped me be a better baseball player. Thanks steroids for getting me that $100 million dollar contract and the endorsement deal with Pepsi. Either that or just shut up and don’t say anything about it. Fake apologies make me sick. You don’t think it was a bad idea, you are just sad you got caught. And btw, stop the blood clot crying..

I swear that it is just not meant for me bring my lunch to work. Sunday, I made a chicken alfredo pasta, put some in a Tupperware container for lunch on Monday, and proceeded to leave it right in the fridge. I was running late. Today, I was actually early, but I still forgot to bring my lunch. What is wrong with me? I mean, besides hunger at lunch time.

I usually go to lunch somewhere around 4PM. Sometimes I move my car from the garage, to the parking lot close to the building. The idea is that I’d rather have my car handy when I leave than adding another 4 minutes to the time I can actually get out of here. Usually, around 4:06, the morning people start clearing out and I can park wherever I want. Except today. I moved my car at 4:15 and the stupid parking lot was full. I almost drove back to the garage, but I decided to just drive around til someone left, which happened at 4:27, 3 minutes before I was supposed to go back to work. That would have sucked if I had to walk twice in one day. *bracesforJameil'slazycomment*
I was just listening to LSG’s My Body, and got to thinking about musical supergroups. You know when some solo artists get together with other solo artists and make a group. I remember reading that Tank, Ginuine, and Tyrese were trying to make a supergroup. I was like, thanks B- level R&B singers. I really want that album. Please tell me you can sense my sarcasm. It got me thinking of some other possible wack combinations like: Never mind, this just gave me an idea for a separate post. Disregard what you’ve read so far, because you’ll be seeing this later this week. LOL

Am I the only one that can’t do anything with gloves on? I feel like my hands have been replaced by big giant nothings. I can’t turn a car key, I can barely open a door, I can’t scratch my… wait, that’s TMI. The point is that I can’t do anything with gloves on.

Someone around me seriously smells like greens. I don’t know who, and I don’t know why. I don’t see any greens around. I really hope that isn’t what the co worker next to me thinks it is: flatulence.
Hey, you! I passed this woman I know from a friend of a friend today. She was all excited. She said. “HEY, YOU!!!” I could tell she didn’t remember my name. She had that look like “where do I know this dude from?” I wanted to say. ‘It’s okay, I don’t remember your name either”, but instead I said. “It’s okay, I don’t remember your name either.” LOL – I’m so silly.

5 comments:

Jameil said...

nope. don't care. still love that album!

rashan's coworker, stop tooting that thing up. it distracts him that he likes it.

pat pat. pardon my awesome. pat pat.

i haven't used steroids yet to make this film better but i might. it's still under consideration.

it is meant for you to bring your lunch. put a note on your computer/your mirror/the door.

no lazy comment from me. i'm all for you getting out of there as early as possible.

AFRICAN BOOTY SCRATCHER. But in the front. Dirty boy. my gloves are fitted so i can do lots with them on. but not type.

that's gas. probably your own.

pserendipity said...

One day, please blog about one of your co-workers that is NOT a loser. Will it be difficult?

Nexgrl said...

Tell your co-worker that she needs to exchange her chair for an exercise ball. That will be better for her posture than kneeling for 8 hrs.

Trish said...

I liked Genuwine but not his new stuff. Funny about the greens, I laughed out loud and my coworker asked what was funny.

My bff has been complaining about her new coworker who smells like fried chicken. I am always mindful when I'm cooking because I hate the smell of food in my clothes and hair.

Not so Anonymous said...

LOL...at the last paragraph. I would totally say that to someone.

Is Mcguire getting the asterik now as well?? I'm sick of the talk to...they should just hush even if they do tell the truth about it...just shut up.

Someone smells like greens, LOLOLOL. That's gross.

Oh and Lauryn is the truth...you need to get over it.