Sunday, August 30, 2009

Spacely's Sprockets

Well, its not your fault that you're very attractive
And from last night I can tell that your active
In bed, but baby don't play the pockets
Cuz I can squeeze a dollar tighter than Spacely's Sprockets
Diamond D - "Red Light, Green Light"

I used to be like that miserly cartoon character from "The Jetsons." In fact, I can still be at times. But at other times, I just can’t stop spending. Which is not a good thing. Jameil calls it hemorrhaging money. I feel like that sometimes. Like I need to put a tourniquet on my wallet.  I need to get it under control.

I’m amazed at how far I can stretch a dollar sometimes. I can go to the grocery store and spend $20 and have enough food for 2 weeks. A pack of chicken breasts, some ground turkey and some peanut butter will last me all week. I don’t get really get tired of eating the same things over and over. Let’s just say I make my chicken and broccoli alfredo, I can get 4 good meals out of that. I can eat it until its gone. I don’t feel the need to have something different. Same thing if I go get fast food. I can eat a $5 footlong Tuna and have all the food I'll need for a day. It’s cheap and its good. I drive an old school car because I don't want/need a car payment. As long as I get to work everyday and to Florida to see Jameil every 2 weeks, I'm good. I don't have to have something new.  I’m amazed at how much loot I don’t spend during those times.

Other times, I feel like I can’t stop spending money to save my life. That’s when I go out to eat a lot, or buy Goose for $35 instead of Smirnoff for $20, or let people hold a dollar when I know I’m never gonna see it again. I just like doing stuff sometimes. As much as I like being in the house, I like going out to restaurants, or to the movies, or anywhere. It’s a positive respite from being in the house all the time. But sometimes I think about how much money could be saved if I didn’t buy drinks at the bar. Or if I didn’t have to tip a subpar waiter. Or if I bought ground beef instead of ground lamb. It’s something that crosses my mind from time to time, usually on the Wednesday or Thursday before payday.

It’s only a problem because of the economy. Not the economy now, but the economy at the end of last year. Yep, I still blame Bush. LOL. That’s when my company decided to make drastic changes to the incentive program. Made it harder to get, and if I do get it, it’s drastically less. I did a quick unscientific audit, and found that unless something drastically changes, I’ll be making 10 k less than last year, just from lack of bonuses. Meanwhile, rent, cable and electricity ain’t going down, so the disposable income that I had last year, is not here this year. I hate actually having to think about money.

I need to get like miserly old Mr. Spacely again. One thing I realize working in the financial services industry is that rich people stay rich by being cheap. Don’t get me wrong, they spend, but they don’t overspend. They don’t let a penny pass them, whereas I have pennies all over the living room, bedroom, dining room and car floor. I overpay for my insurance because I don’t feel like calling to get a new company. I probably don’t need HBO when I can see all the shows on Yidio. Let’s not even talk about those days I waste gas by wandering aimlessly around the city. The thing that bugs me is that I know I can do better, because sometimes I do. I just need to do it more consistently.

PS – I’m not looking for financial advice. I’m just writing for my own gratification. I’m incapable of doing what someone else tells me to do, unless I was already going to do it. Thanks…

Thursday, August 27, 2009

Drunk By Myself

I'm drunk by myself, gun under my seat
I don't want none of my peeps caught up in none of my beef
I'm a ride to the end of the road if I have to
Praying no car speeds by for me to crash to
Steering wheel in my hand
Trying to hold it steady
Anything in my way is dead
Cause that's the way I feel, I am already
When I'm drunk by myself alone in the zone
Drunk by myself

Nas – “Drunk By Myself”

It only happens once a year. For some people it’s a monumental occasion. Others look upon it with dread. I’m talking about birthdays. And I need you all to do me a favor. Next time you are out with someone on their birthday, buy them a drink!!! Or maybe I’m wrong. Maybe we don’t do that anymore. I remember back in the day when I used to be a club hoppin’, party animal, birthdays were the one time that you had to break bread for your people. Even if you were used to being miserly, it is your solemn duty as a friend to make sure that the birthday boy or girl gets twisted. If you let the birthday boy buy his own drinks… he might as well get drunk by himself.

My last birthday, one of my closest friends pissed me off so badly that I haven’t talked to her since, save a text message to let her know I am still alive. What had happened was…She planned a birthday dinner (about a week after) for me. Things just kept coming up, so it got pushed back a couple of times. By the time we actually went out to dinner, it was 3 weeks after my birthday. Whatever, that was no biggie. When I showed up at the restaurant, I noticed that it wasn’t me and her like I thought it would be, but me, her and 3 of HER friends. Yeah, I knew the people, but they weren’t my friends. So, my birthday dinner turned into an excuse for her to hang out with her friends. The kicker came when the check came. She whispered that she didn’t have enough money to pay for my dinner and drinks. Yeah, so why da bleep did you invite me? I could have went to Subway and got a tuna sub and the liquor store to get me a bottle of Bacardi instead of buying these marked up drinks. It’s supposed to be my birthday…hook me up! Even if I bought my own dinner, you could have at least got me a shot or four… I might as well have stayed home and got drunk by myself. It would have been cheaper.

Last weekend was Jameil’s birthday. We were in Orlando celebrating with some friends. We hit up 4 different spots that night. At some point, I would have expected someone besides me would have bought her a drink, but I guess we don’t do that no mo’. Spot one.. no drinks.. Spot 2 no drinks… Spot 3… you guessed it, no drinks. Maybe if I wasn’t there, it would have been different, but trust and believe.. you can buy my girl a drink and I will not be offended, especially when you have known her longer than me. I’m not insecure about free liquor. Go head and make that happen! Spot 4 was just me and her, by ourselves.

Now, I’m giving you fair warning. In the unlikely event that you and I are in the same spot on November 25th, I expect drink buying. I don’t ask for much, just for someone to take my keys and pass the liquor. I don’t need top shelf, I don’t need a $15 cocktail, just keep them strong and keep them coming. Just make sure you don’t let me drink Crown. I don’t know how to act off that, but that’s a story for another day. Nothing sucks worse than having to get yourself faded on your birthday. Might as well get drunk by myself.

Wednesday, August 26, 2009

Allow Me To Reintroduce Myself...

Allow me to re-introduce myself
My name is Hov', OH, H-to-the-O-V
I used to move snowflakes by the O-Z
I guess even back then you can call me
CEO of the R-O-C, 
Jay-Z - Public Service Announcement

Allow me to reintroduce myself.. My name is...Fool, you know me. I’m Rashan.. Rashan Jamal… Used to be T. Casanova… Used to be the blogging equivalent of Prince. You know blogging prolifically like he put out music. I guess, Lil Wayne would be a more contemporary example, but I just can’t compare myself to him. I used to blog 5 times a week, sometimes 6. I used to read and comment all the time. But then I stopped.

There was no reason for it other than I felt like stopping. How very self absorbed of me. And I went out like I said I would. No fanfare, no fake posts teasing that I’m gonna quit so people will beg me to stay. I always felt those posts were disingenuous and basically cries for attention. So, when I felt like stopping, I just stopped. A month went by with no new posts, and I guess people finally got the point. Rashan’s Beats Rhymes and Life was done.

But today is a new day… I think I’m back. I say “think” because I don’t want to be one of those bloggers that goes away for awhile, then comes back and posts once every fiscal quarter. If I come back, then I want to be back for good. So, fair warning… this blogging thing might not stick. For awhile I felt like I said everything there was to say in my 3 years of blogging. I felt like I was repeating myself. I felt like it was too much effort to keep up with everybody, when all I wanted to do was come home and watch a movie. Okay, real spit.. I wanted a new blog template, but if I got one it would have lost all my old comments. And you guys left some of the funniest comments and I sure don’t want to lose those. Sometimes, I just pull up my 2 old blogs and just crack up. Most of the time at myself.. but at the comments too. (Yep, I’m still conceited.)

I noticed that a lot of the blog world has fallen off, so we’ll see if anybody is still out there reading. If so, welcome back. If you are new… then welcome to my madness. Let’s start the show…