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Wednesday, February 10, 2010

Valentine's Day Hate

I don't like being a cliche, but on this subject I am. I'm a man, and I think Valentine's Day is stupid. Stop me if you've heard this before. I know men across the country are lamenting the fact that on Sunday, they are expected to shower their significant others with gifts so soon after Christmas. And for alot of men, the return will not be equitable. They don't want candy and flowers. It's really a woman's holiday. Then you have the people, both male and female that hate the day because they aren't boo'd up. They get tired of seeing other people being blissfully happy while they are lonely and bitter. I've been single many times on VDay, but it never really bothered me.Finally you have the people like me that just don't like it because it's a made up holiday. You'll hear conspiracy theories abound from people like us about greeting card companies, jewelers and florists.

But really, that's not why I don't like Valentine's Day. For me, it's a lot more personal. You see, my father's birthday was February 14th. He died a long time ago, and I don't usually think about it except for around this time of the year. I always seem to retreat into my thoughts this time of the year. The frustrating thing is that I know it's going to happen, but I seem powerless to stop it. I don't really feel like celebrating. Since my wonderful, loving girlfriend does like Valentine's Day, I've tried to get over it and go with the flow, but the more I try, the more I find myself struggling. I'm not really the emotional type, so it bothers me that this bothers me so much. 

My procrastination reared its ugly head this year again. I waited way too long to figure out what I wanted to get Jameil. We already have dinner plans, a wine tasting and some other stuff that we are going to be doing, but I never quite got around to the gift part, so today I focused on that. Well, at least I tried. I found myself feeling some kind of way again. I don't know what's wrong with me. I'm usually so steady, but this V Day thing keeps messing me up in the head. I need to find a way to get over this crap. Thanks for reading my therapy session.

7 comments:

Jameil said...

Way to make me sound like an insensitive cad. I've always loved Valentine's Day, single or attached, because most people are so happy that day. When my friends were single (or in LDRs) at HU we all went out to dinner together on Valentine's Day and had a blast. The bitterness has always been bizarre for me. I think of it as a time where I'll have another something small and cute that will remind me of you and an impetus to make a little effort to get out of the house i.e. the wine tasting, a nice restaurant. It doesn't have to be Valentine's Day. It can be our own made-up holiday, every 18th of the month (or 23rd... just sayin) but it's fun. Now that I've sounded sufficiently sheepish, I still want my Valentine's fun. AND to quote your mom, "YOU LOSE!!!!!!!"

LoVe.Peace.Curls. said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
LoVe.Peace.Curls. said...

I hope that you stay in good spirits on your father's birthday. I'm sure Jameil will make sure of that! Lol. You guys are so cute!
But anywho, I'm not a fan of V-day either, and my boyfriend has known this before we became a couple, so we kind of celebrate it but not really lol. I've always felt like I'd rather receive "just because" gifts and stuff on random days than to be bombarded with typical flowers (which I hate the smell of) and candy filled with nasty stuff that I don't eat on a day when guys feel like they have to give these things to you... I'm out of the stuffed animal phase...I don't want any teddies and bunnies and ish... so to me, it's more about the time spent on/around v-day than it is gifts...

Nexgrl said...

I have a love/hate relationship with Valentine's Day.

I hope that you and Jameil have a wonderful day.

Not So Anonymous said...

I have always loved Vday...it's all about love and happiness (and butterflies and sunny skies, lol). Seriously, it's a day where people show love...not only for romantic partners either. It's my mother's fave holiday, so she always treated it like a second Christmas for us. And, because she put so much effort into it, I've never hated the holiday when I'm single. It's about more than romance.

With all that said, I understand how the day being the same as your Dad's birth could cause some emotional issues. It's okay to embrace your emotions and I'm sure Jameil will keep you pepped up, too!

Gorgeous_Puddin said...

I too have a love/hate relationship with V-day.But I mostly love it. I love the whole idea of love. I love seeing people happy and in love and I have a lot of love signs and hearts around my house. Okay I take it back I don't hate I just love LOVE. That's right Jameil if you have to change the date do it, but celebrate black love!

Adei von K said...

Aww.

I *DREAD* the day one of my parents leave me.

If you weren't in a relationship, what would you do on your dad's birthday? Maybe to find peace on this day, you can do something in honor of him and then spend the rest of the day with the ones you love who are still with you.