Wednesday, October 14, 2009

The Bachelorette Party

Yesterday at work we had phone and computer issues that basically meant that we did nothing for about 5 hours. So, after reading blogs and facebook playing around for a couple hours, I finally broke down and joined the conversation that my co workers were having. A little background: One of my lesbian co workers is "getting married" soon, and they decided to throw her a bachelorette party.  I think everyone was a little confused as to what you do when 2 members of the same sex get married, so it really was just game night with people drinking and playing Taboo and Family Feud. Anyway, I was invited, but I politely declined as I was supposed to be going to Florida this past weekend. Jameil came to me instead, but still I wasn't trying to subject her to craziness that is my co-workers. As I heard the details of said party, it seems like I made the right decision.

First, the bride (or groom) got lost and wound up like 3 cities away. She was using her GPS on the phone and the host's address wasn't registering. So, she kept driving. The party was in Marietta, and the bride instead of calling for directions, just kept going. Next thing you know she was in Acworth. ( I know this wont mean anything to people unfamiliar with Atlanta suburbs, but suffice to say, she was way out of where she was supposed to be.) Even when people called her and offered directions or to come pick her up, she just refused. 3 hours later, she finally broke down and let somebody meet her at the job and followed them to the party. Apparently by the time she got there, she was manic and ready to go and had to be talked down to even come inside.

Then there's the co-worker who is apparently engaged to a midget. Well, not quite a midget, but not quite a regular short guy. He was so short that she felt the need to issue a warning so people wouldn't stare. While he told the girl that he is 5'1", everybody who's seen him says that's a lie. They say more like 4'6", 4'7". Anyway, he was there. They say he is the nicest person you'll ever meet, but just short. And apparently not very attractive. And might look like that guy Beetlejuice from the Howard Stern show.  One of the bride's friends said he looked like that stack of money with the googly eyes from the Geico commercials. Oh, and apparently he passed out drunk after 2 drinks, which led to more jokes about his size and blood alcohol content. They didn't have a picture, but even if they did, I don't think I would have looked, what with my irrational midget phobia.

Let's move on to the games. Drunk board games are hilarious and fun to me. But apparently people were yelling and screaming and about to fight over some Family Feud. That would have annoyed me so I'm glad I stayed home. I have a really low tolerance for messy situations. I'm extremely competitive when it comes to games, but it's supposed to be fun. Not to mention, I would have been drinking, so there's no telling what I would have said to them. Would have had a bunch of hurt feelings. I'll let them keep thinking I'm a lovable jerk, not a mean one. So, yeah, I'm glad I didn't go to the bachelorette party. I think it was best for all involved that I sat that one out. Shoot, they didn't have no strippers. LOL


Ladynay said...

I'm going to my second lesbian wedding next year! YAY!

WTH was up with one of the bride's not wanting directions unless it's from a tech device? She must be the more "manly" one in the relationship!

You are the 3rd person I "know" with a midget phobia. What's up with that? Afraid they gonna bite your knees or something? (j/k)

Bout to go at it over a board game? Really? Ummm yeah, the powers that be/Jameil/whomever you wanna give credit too did the right thing by keeping you away from that mess! LOL

Jameil said...

No sir. I don't deal well with drama AT ALL. Ladynay, I'll take that credit! And might look like that guy Beetlejuice from the Howard Stern show??? Rashan! Wow...

Ginae said...

LMAO @ this whole post...Lawd, I do wish I could have been there just to get my laugh! hilarity for days...

That beetlejuice dude on Howard Stern is pretty fugly...but see even he found somebody to's up with that?

SincerelyGo said... are too much! Where are they getting married at? I didn't think that was legal? Is it? So are you going to the wedding?

I've don't recall your midget phobia but I'm not at all surprised!

Crazy Ass...



Desy said...

so did couple getting married both attend this event?

sometimes, wonder about the people you work with... she didn't call to ask for directions? really? what is the logic in just driving around aimlessly?

but speaking of logic- becoming heated over family feud... THAT's quality logic within itself... how could you have missed that *smh*

12kyle said...

You know that I know that Acworth FAR from Marietta! LOL

I don't blame you for not going. Alcohol is the truth syrum. You start drinking and the next thing you know, you're telling them how wack they really are. LOL

Not so Anonymous said...

I can no longer read your blog at work because it has me laughing way too loudly. When you said beetle juice, and then the stack of money with the googley eyes I just about passed out...lmao.

Rashan Jamal said...

@ ladynay - from the pictures, it seems like the other one is more manly, this one is just stubborn. the phobia is irrational, i don't know what it is.

@ jameil - the beetlejuice thing was somebody elses quote. I haven't seen him

@ ginae - i'll stick with the recap rather than actually being there. LOL

@ Go - its not a legal thing, they are having a commitment ceremony. its gonna be in Orlando, so ummm.. No, I'm not going

@ desy - only the one I work with was there. not very logical, but it seems par for the course with the co workers.

@ kyle - yeah, that's mad far. I don't know that I wouldn't have just turned around and went home. Yeah, that sauce would have me spitting the truth

@ Aretha - please dont get fired on my account. LOL